Menopause - Menopausal Women speak about menopause and womens health - menopausal help

Responses to Questionaire
(800 women were polled, 80 answered - this is what they have to say)

I think herbs to help manage the early phases of menopause (peri) are important. I actually put my experiences and discoveries into an article at Ezinearticles.com because I thought my research, expierience/ experiments and results would be helpful. Based on comments and emails, I know the article is helpful and I think something similar would be great on your site.

Also, managing the hot flashes was difficult until I turned to homeopathics (I actually stopped using Vitex finally (something I had been taking for the peri portion) and it helped). I think this area would benefit other women, too. I like the ad I saw on the site for menopause bedding. I found Hanes organic cotton nightgowns to be the best as it allows my skin to breathe and cool with a slight absorbent benefit. Maybe more clothing (and other) options or suggestions for those night time visitors. I had a former student tell me she successfully used Aloe Vera flower essence for her hot flashes.

My early menopause symptoms showed up right around the time I had a spontaneous Kundalini activation in 1996. I was so comforted to find Susun's article/comments (I forget which now, it's been so long since I read it) at the time about Kundalini and menopause since I had already had some similar thoughts. I think emphasizing the spiritual transformation aspects of this process is critical to maintaining and even enhacing women's health. It seems the culture is almost exclusively interested in women as breeding machines rather than viewing our physical reproductive capabilities as a temporary asset, to be traded in further down the road for a boost in personal power and creative avenues. In this vein, maybe an area about what creative outlets women discovered during/after cessation of their menses, and maybe those activities/mediums they used to help process their changing internal panoramas.

I personally find myself exploring a new career that requires a few years of school. My process has allowed/encouraged me to shed false identities and unleash those repressed power aspects of myself -- I've decided to attempt a legal career as an attorney -- that's law school at nearly 49 years of age! Only the mind-altering freedom of menopause could give me courage to even contemplate such a step [uproarious laughter].

What I would like to see on a sight is the transformational process of menopause, the incredible shift to becoming a crone and being a woman of wisdom. There was a woman who had undergone chemotherapy and said that she went from "perimenopause" to full blown menopause after her treatment. I told her that the more severe the symptoms of menopause the healthy you are. The worried forlorn face she had turned into one of knowing and power. That is what I would like to see. You know, the wise woman tradition and the simple ways we can nourish ourselves, yogurt, nettle, oat straw etc. etc. P.S. Oh and RAGE, that has got to be one of the most important things about menopause there is.......:-)

I'm premenopausal, so I'm not really well versed in this area. I've got the menstrual stuff pretty much figured out re: herbs, diet, etc. I would like some focus on preparation for menopause so that there aren't so many nasties to deal with once one gets there. The question that I get asked about most at my herb stand at the market is - herbs to use instead of Hormone Replacement Therapy, - if I sell wild yam (I don't) and herbs to use for alleviating uncomfortable symptoms, usually hot flashes and mood swings.

Well...I did menopause from about 1994 to 1996 with Susun's purple book - What I liked was that, no matter what screwy symptom showed up next, I could go to the book, find it, and say "Oh, that's just menopause." Then I could eithr just see if it went away or start with the most natural, least invasive remedies. For sure I avoided a D&C that way and who-knows-what-else had I freaked out and gone to the doctor about some of these things. In my experience, the best guidance one can receive about menopause is to be helped to see that, even if it takes a little effort, menopause should be welcomed as a way to get "off the wheel" (of hormones that may drive you to put the species before your soul) and thus to achieve some peace, calm, and dignity.

To be honest, I look to Susun Weed for help when I need it. She's served me so well over the last 18 years. Since I've just begun true menopausal symptoms in the last three months, I guess you could say I've just begun the journey. I am in awe of the wonder of my body now just as I was during pregnancy. For now I am trying to listen to messages sent to me and learn my lessons easier than I did in my childbearing years when I learned most things kicking and screaming instead of allowing the flow to carry me.

What I really want to know is when, if ever, my memory will return. My mind is my best attribute and my memory is crucial to its survival, do I really have alzeimers? The other big question I have about menopause is whether to take hormones or "live on tofu and die" is there another option?

I am most concerned about osteoporosis, heart and health of all reproductive organs without going on ERT.

Some of us would appreciate knowing how and where we can find more natural hormone therapy for supplementation, and then the herbs to support that. I feel that I definitely want to supplement with natural hormones---Im sick of hurting for the natural act of making love, do not enjoy the itching, burning and thin vaginal skin that wants to bleed, and do not want to have to constantly be "fussing" with creams and salves and lubrications, but guess what--- there is so very little about those of us who have no oavaries to support and WANT supplimentation.

I am 42. I started having menopausal symptoms several years ago. A friend recommended Menopausal Years to me. It has become very well-worn in my home and has helped me greatly. Recently, however, I have come to realize how in a rush I was to be "menopausal", shut off as I've been all my life to becoming pregnant and being a mother. Recently, you have helped me, with your counsel, to regulate my cycles (with the use of red clover infusion), and I am exploring the possibility of having a child.

So, what is important to me is to have your site remember and acknowledge that we can be menopausal and child-bearing. Both. That having menopausal symptoms early does not put one out of one category and into the other overnight. I would like to see your site emphasize the in-between period, the time of transitioning when one isn't quite a crone, isn't quite a virgin or mother, but is all of these and still unfolding.

I am now menopausal age, but was surgically menopaused 20+ years ago. No one realized I was experiencing perimenopause when I quit taking the pills (that gave me PMS), and we all thought I was just going crazy.

I know way too many young ladies who are being surgically attacked these days, (5 in their 20's!) due to endometriosis usually. They need to know what to expect and that there are options other than a lifetime of taking horse piss pills. The experience I have had with them is that they only want to listen to the md-god. Down the road, when they realize it ain't heaven he sent them to, they will need some sane advice and information.

One thing I've found odd ...I've discussed this with two friends who were also surgically menopaused years ago, we are now experiencing some of the symptoms associated with meno. ie: less body hair, tiredness, recurrence of 'flashing', etc. so maybe this isn't hormonal, but age related? Menopause - It ain't nuthin' to be scared of.... Just like adolescence, this too will pass.

My immediate thought is to include info/healing for those of us in the "perimenopausal" years. I'm 41 and am told that some of my mood and health issues are from this time in my life. I've heard that some of the Omega 3 fatty acids will help, but haven't started a course of treatment yet.

When I want a solid, knowledgeable answer to a question I want to get it from an expert. So, in short, my preference for a menopausal site is for q&a with Susun and other souls whose answers I can rely on.

* Menopausal questions/concerns:
1- When does a woman become an "official crone" after mensis start decreasing (1 year after blood flow stops? I'm unsure).

2- When do men usually enter "their" menopause? My husband Frank is 57, and has already see the "Mid-Life Crisis" come and go, but I feel he's menopausal on/off, almost a type of depression, where he seems so tired or out-of-touch with the here and now, and not wanting to make eye contact, that I feel he's in his "menopausal" phase - just look at how MENopause is spelled - I looked at plays on words and words within words.

3- Add humor into your website, esp. when discussing very difficult issues (i.e. Should I start hormone replacement therapy, mindfully use herbals instead, or with expert advise, use both menopausal helpers?, etc.).

4- If you can incorporate SIMPLE graphics or photos/pictures (cartoon and real life) into explaining multi-layered issues or dealing with difficult medical terms, please do so. Many people, especially when biological age increases, visual acuity will help the waining logical left-side brain processing, helping to link the creative right-side brain with the former.

I am, I guess one says, 'peri-menopausal'; I hope I qualify. ;) The single most important piece of knowledge needing to be shared, IMHO, is that vitex, chaste berry, can be used to shrink fibroids, which in this country usually lead to hysterectomy once they begin to bleed incessantly. During the peri-menopausal years, high levels of hormones surging through the body result in the swelling of these inocuous growths on the uterus. After menopause, once the hormonal levels diminish in the system, fibroids disappear naturally.

I make a lovely miso soup using the 'tea' of Corsica seaweed which has been boiled for 5 min. and adding a tablespoon per cup of miso. Sometimes I add cooked brown rice, toasted nori, tofu cubes, chives, or fresh minced parsely. It's easy and effective, not to mention tastey!

What is important to me is healthy advice through informative knowledge (someone who knows what their talking about). I went into a site read all the information thoroughly and it sounded good. The information was for cleansing the liver and menopause plus using Chinese herbs. Really sounded good. I've learned a lot since then. Now I can spot a bad site.

I really liked what you said about calcium and the perfect way to maintain bone health, that information just blew me away. Plus the weed walks. Your Topics for information should be clear and easy to understand. I know a lot of these sites are out to sell their products and are trying to sucker people in. Your site seems very people friendly. I enjoyed it thoroughly.

MORE OF: I have never met so many women that are suffering from menopause. They are at a loss not knowing where to turn. When they go to their doctor, he can't find anything wrong with them. We need more clear and precise information on menopause. It's hard to believe that doctors don't know more about menopause, other than just handing out pills for the magic cure.

Many women are uninformed about other natural alternatives that will help produce good working estrogen other than what a doctor has to offer for estrogen therapy. You see advertized on TV chemicals (drugs) that will help you overcome monopause, with all kinds of side affects that are played down. Women really believe that these products are safe and are the only alternatives available. Put out more information on this subject.

I feel that learning more about what foods that will enhance your diet during menopause and which foods will energize you are very important. And what foods will make you feel depressed and tired. Many women don't relized how foods really affect us. I would like to see more information on this subject too. When I was talking to a good friend of mind about how foods affect us mentally and physically she thought I was crazy. She didn't believe me. A lot of women are ignorant in this suject. Please help inform them.

More menopause recipes would also be great. More information on a cleansing program. I've had a lot women asking me for a good program. What I'm also looking for is sincerity and honesty, a site who cares about truly helping women. Can you offer this?

I dislike sites that focus solely on jounaling or traditional healthcare. My husband and I have been blindsided by life and are in business for ourselves in addition to working for other people. I dislike sites that focus on getting you to buy products at the expense of using your own mind and heart to make decisions for yourself.

I'm in the peri-menopausal years. However have more hair growing on my chin than most 16 year old boys!!!! Hehe. Would like you to focus on the fact that this is not a disease or ailment but a natural part of life! What is important to me? - Ease of negotiating the site and no broken links and such, as far as on line sites. In general up to date information-keeping us informed on the latest in health care-and telling us what our doctors won't tell us.

As a 59 yr old crone hotflashing since my hysteroscopy 5 years ago for fibroid tumors, I am looking for a quick , non estrogen, inexpensive treatment to reduce the hotflashes. I work full time, am short on energy and money and am tired from lack of sleep from the flashes. I am a breast cancern survivor with osteoporosis.

Life in the mind is divine, yet we need to be in-line, on-line and on time to be with the divine in each of us. Do the walk, yes, talk, and yes squalk for all. love and sisterhood in the Pause that refreshes.

My experience with hot flashes during menopause was wonderful. I would get a hot flash whenever I went to bed in the winter – and as soon as I felt the cold sheets the flash would come on and heat up the bed to a toasty 100 degrees. I got warm fast and thanked the menopause goddess. My partner liked it too!

Some of the issues I would like addressed are:
1. The actual PHYSICAL body change...exteriorly. I never had a stomach and within a year, I have this huge stomach that has "drooped" over my pelvic girdle...just like the Venus of Willendorf...what the heck is that? Hair leaving places and coming other places...just basic body changes that make me wonder if this is "normal" or not. How do we cope with our changing bodies---in a society that places so much emphasis on youth and "stick-type" beauty?

2. A place where information is available for our partners, husbands and children---about the things that are happening to us so that they can understand the profundity of these changes and how best they can support us and love us as we grow into this phase of our life.

3. What supplements are best and for what symptoms? What works for one woman may not work for another. A simple guide through the avalanche of differing menopausal information would be nice.

4. A way for us to network in community with other women going through these changes.

What I'd look for in a menopausal website would be basically the same info you offer in your books, but a condensed version of it. For example, a list of common symptoms and what to do about them. Or just some of your positive spins on what we're going through rather than the negative there's-something-wrong-with-us attitudes so prevalent out there. Some articles to click on would be helpful and of course info on how to get your books.

May I suggest information for women like myself, who aren't menopausal, but are "getting there". I would be interested to know what I might do for myself to prepare for a healthy change of life.

I have found Susun's menopause book a life/mind-saver for years...especially when what I was experiencing seemed "too soon" to be menopause. And whenever I've recommended and given the book to other women their response has been one of recognition, relief, and gratitude. So the book has been my main source of info.

As to what I find most interesting and challenging (and which I've never seen addressed on a menopause website) has nothing to do with the physical aspects of the process. It has to do with the reevaluation that takes place (for some of us) of our lives, of how we want to spend our time. I have experienced a lot of mourning...for lost youth, beauty, and unfulfilled dreams. Coming through this mourning process has in many ways changed my life (a process still unfolding...no sense of "doneness" yet). It is a tremendous gift, but one which comes with many challenges, including many calls to change one's life that are upsetting to self and others. Things are stirred up!

Included...maybe central...is looking at love, sex, and relationship. As a woman in a monogamous relationship for 26 years, suddenly I have been confronted with not less of an erotic life, but more. And as people respond to the energy I seem to be swimming in, I have found one of the great challenges of being 50 to be acknowledging (fearing?) that the time may come when it is the last time: the last time a man looks at me "that way", the last time someone new wants me...that sort of thing. I have found this so fascinating, hard, sad, happy, joyous, dizzying.

So, maybe on a website there could be room for stories or a chat room (although, I've never participated in one and can't say that I would) about life changes, women who reevaluated their lives and acted, etc.

Thanks for the invite to give input about the menopause site. Some things I am interested in are real information about how the hormonal system works in the body and ways to nourish this system. Alot of the information out there is focused on treating symptoms as if they are disease.....and I am interested in nourishing my system as I am perimenopausal and feel changes happening.

I also would like to be educated about the use of some of the poular "treatments" ie progesterone products so that I can educate others....I have heard Susun speak about this many times...yet would love to have a place to further educate myself and to send others for this important information. Specifically I would like more information about the down side of popular approaches ie soy, bone density, wild yam etc.

Also I am wanting information about staying connected to myself so that I can trust when something is a miss and trust my intution....so I see cultivating inution as a big part of what I am interested in. Also wise woman ways...working with the steps of healing...working with varous modalities and staying focused and centered.....and in light of the cultural messages. Even though there are other sights I am excited about this site as I know that offering a wise woman perspective is not the norm and would be a wonderful resource.

Well i have your book i am 42 years and just starting i would love to see more about hot flashes at this age and more about early 40's and what women go though and also about sex life and so on keep the good work i love the book and can't wait for the new web site it well be very helpful thank you again.

I'm a late bloomer, even though I have celebrated my 48th birthday 9/19. My periods are regular and I was recently tested for my FSH level which resulted in a low percentage. Crazy enough, my husband and I are going to try through the remaining of my 48th year to conceive. The sites I have visited have been ones that I have found through watching morning TV show guests that give their addresses. Some are quite bewildering. I look for the ones that give strong advice, can give alternative therapies and that are very empathetic to this metamorphosis. And, I do not like to see a lot of pop up ads-that is a complete turnoff. Good luck in your endeavor and I look forward to your email announcing its opening!

I am a 30 year old post-menopausal woman. I have had "Premature Ovarian Failure" my entire life which made my body start the metamorphosis into menopause at the ripe old age of 12! There is not much natural help out there for women like me. I struggle for the best answer to help my body now and to benefit me 50 years from now. I know that we are a minority, but more and more women are becoming prematurely menopausal. I know from experience that it hits your body VERY hard because it is not your time. I would appreciate something for us younger women. This is my two cents worth of advice. I hope it helps.

Sorry, I'm past menopause (63 years old). Wish I could help. And ... I wish I'd known of Susun's books when I was going thru it. It was a very exciting time of my life and I recommend it for everywoman/man!

Hi! I'd love to be a part of this. I had my hormone level checked some time ago because I was noticing changes in my cycle which has always been regular, like clockwork! It showed that I wasn't menopausal yet, but I feel I am starting the process. I get hot flashes or what seems to me to be hot flashes. Sometimes I breakout in sweat on my forehead. A business friend saw it one day and made the comment that it was a hotflash!

I am only 44, but my first cousin was completely finished with hers by the time she was 38 and she hasn't had a hysterectomy either. I am interested in knowing what alternatives there are to hormone replacement therapy. None of the women in my family have ever had it and I'd like to go through it without if possible. So I'd like to know more about the pros and cons. Thanks!

I just turned 55 (today actually), and am hopefully getting to the end of my own menopause, but still always searching for ways to keep healthy. I've browsed Susun's book (as well as many others), talked with my cohorts, done a lot of research in the traditional medical literature (given my profession!), and generally muddled my way through. I also see a naturopath, who has helped not specifically focusing on the menopause itself, but using various herbs and homeopathics to tweak my body for other allergy conditions. After much research and some experimentation with soy, I opted to try the Vitex and have seen moderate and tolerable results there.

Yes, I am 55 ... A few thoughts about menopause. Firstly... still.. most women know little about menopause. Women speak of it a little more today then 5 or 6 years ago. Women need to feel that they are not alone - there are others having similar experiences. Pre-menopause, aside from having a child, I had little contact with doctors - and knew relatively little about my body. When my body started to change, I didn't know what to expect or what to do. there is so much medical info about menopause and it is not easy, even in a major city, to find someone to advise you - either they are urging HRT immediately and when you say you don't want it - they note on their reports 'REFUSES HRT' ... even the tone makes you feel as though you are making a huge mistake.

Your book was the first real help I found. I did come across other books but found they were too 'technical' and lacked the spiritual side which your book embraces so beautifully. Personally, I'd like to understand more about using herbs. I am eager to get the new edition of Menopausal Years so that I can study it carefully. It's hard to know how to mix and match herbs and suppliments - when lots seems to be happening with my body I sometimes feel confused about what to try first. (and about what is going on...) I guess I really want someone to sit down with me, hold my metaphorical hand and lead me along :-)

One more comment, the crone years really are the wisdom years, I have found that I turn more and more to food for my soul: writing, music, art, jewelry, etc. that nurtures these aspects. There are probably many events which promote spiritual growth for women being held throughout the country.. more women need to know about them - especially menopausal women...

For me an important subject would be erratic periods, flooding, your moontime changing. The pause coming on. And what herbs are helpful for those things. Also, some info on other changing parts of the body like thick lymph nodes right before bleeding. Things like that, etc. The most important thing is knowing there are ways to get the right information, in a timely fashion and with someone you trust. Interaction and discussion.

I think it's great to include men. A male friend of mine who is the same age, (51) called me the other day and asked if I could give him advice on cleaning up his diet and his system, so he won't feel so sluggish. I'm sure it's male menopause for him. I would like to know what signs and symptoms to watch for in them and good herbal helpers.

I think anything you write about menopause can be, should be geared to action, an amazon-like approach to life and living...all those attitudes that you want to see women embrace and the absence of same, causes you to scream at them (us). THIS is a time for a none-too-gentle poke in the shoulder. In my humble opinion...which reminds me...all the women I've spoken to talk about rage, and they, like me, often do not know what to do about it since we've nurtured it so long. Maybe this is where your support for going afterwhat one needs to comes in yet again.

I'd love to see an extensive bibliography, humor, humor, humor, a list of symptoms and the protocols such as used in BC/BH.

I have not seen the new edition of the menopause book, but I did not buy the first one because the information and style contained in Breast Cancer/Health offers such a well-rounded wealth of infomation, and compared to that book, felt I'd gotten the best end of the deal.

What I have found extremely interesting, is the large number of women I've spoken to who do not use HRT. They say they've read to much against HRT to use it.

The things that I would like to see on the site include a discussion board, so women/men can share experiences, herbal formulas to help throughout the various phases, and information/research on how the various woman-positive cultures of the world view (including technical information on how they handle the various *challenges* women face) the crone phase of womanhood.

The physical aspects of menopause have not concerned me as much as the emotional/mental changes. If I had known, in advance, the extreme to which I "would not feel like myself" I think I would have not have been as worried that I was losing my mind.

ERT/HRT information is very important to many of my friends. Advertisers are really applying the pressure, now that the massive market of baby boomers is entering the menopausal years. Many of my friends are tempted to take the "easy way" out as they have been taught that menopause is a condition, rather than a natural, life experience.

I would love to see more information on peri-menopause.....when you head towards actual menopause but aren't there yet....I had no idea until about a year ago that this even existed. What to expect leading up to the menopause and how you can deal with it. (ie. I found out because I cannot take hormone therapy due to breast cancer in the family that B vitamins offer a good alternative).

Congratulations on the new domain! A woman-centered and herb-focused menopause site will be a MOST WELCOME addition to what's out there. I know that my friends and I have a variety of interests. Those that are already in menopause complain about the hot flashes the most, along with the other typical symptoms. I personally would like to see a good discussion of the problems with HRT in dealing with this -- many of my women friends just run to HRT the instant it starts. I would love to have a site to send them to with an herbal slant and good info.

But a lot of my 40-something friends and I are perimenopausal, and we feel somewhat unprepared for what is ahead. We are feeling things like fatigue, foggy brains, roving aches and pains, mini-hot flashes, etc. and we don't know if these symptoms are even hormonal or what to expect next! So a section on perimenopause for 40-something women would be really appreciated.....with hints about what we can be doing NOW to ease the journey later.

And I know you won't forget to have a section on the problems with SOY products! Can't wait to see the new site!

What I love is the opportunity to participate in discussion groups directly related to sites like yours - where I know the chances of findng like minded and like spirited souls to communicate with are just about %100 guaranteed. A link to a email list - for those of us who want to learn from each other, as well as you.

Even though I am 42 I have been preparing my body for this new adventure so hopefully it won't be too bad? I would love to see info. on herbs for menopause and soy as well, I plan to treat my menopause all naturally! Can't wait to see the new site!

I would say the most important thing for me is information on diet and exercise ideas as well as helpful herbs. Knowing what is normal and what what should make you run to an ER is the key, along with the herbal and food possibilities for menopause. Again, this is where your "messages" come in so beautifully, because we need to listen to ourselves and intuit whether what we are experiencing falls into the range of "normal" or not.

And, of course, one's changing identity within the culture is such a big issue. For one, I advocate allowing the honor of "crone" way, way before the climacteric which, for many of us is a long, long way off. I know I can call myself whatever I like, but at 52, and, even tangentally within this society, I am like a 13 year old...neither here nor there, and with all the general confusion about what's happening physicially and emotionally, and experiencing job discrimination, and not ever, EVER being able to relate to the AARP types who have known lifestyles and had philosophies I can only imagine, I WANTA BE A CRONE...NOW! OK.

So that boils down to a sense of belonging and sense of soul, and I understand that nobody needs to give you permission, but...I need permission. I'm ashamed to say I needed your permission, shall we call it encouragement?, to listen to my body and trust it. Shall we call it reinforcement? Whatever it's name, out here in da woild, I think we all need all the good mothers we can get to say, OK, and that, I believe is one of the gifts you give.

I'm 43 now and my period has been changing over the past few years - it's hard to know what might be menopause, what might be connected to problems I've had with fibroid tumors and flooding, what might be associated with diabetes - so I guess one topic I'd be interested in is how different illnesses including diabetes, MS, fibromyalgia, etc. would effect the menopause experience.

Also, I'd like to have some kind of perspecitive for mothers moving through menopause as their daughters are moving through puberty.

Links! I've loved the spiders web of information of moving from topic to topic as I gather information.

I DO NOT like any "replacement" for that time. It is normal and only a few herbs to make it a little bit better (when needed) and the acceptance of what it comes should solve problems......well, of course, this is my opinion........:-)) There will surely be for a lot of women ........they just don't know what's happening, what will come then, sex, hot, feelings.......a mix of confusing things that certainly would drive a lot of women crazy! People I know that are passing thru live very well with all symptoms. Some take medicine, some not. But all I know, face it as normal. I think that sex, being fat, and loss of youth in both, body and mind would be the first search for a woman.....

The relation between seminal fluid and menopausing is an important focus topic. Anecdotal evidence is a priority to me when looking for information.

Most of the sites out there today are very clinical and cold. We need a site that does not treat you like your life is half over, instead, a site that helps us realize that we have only just begun. Topics on how to deal with the frustration and loss we think we have when we stop being able to bear children.

Hot Flashes are number one on my list, they are very annoying and generally make you feel lousy. Mood Swings are next in line, how to deal with this on a daily basis. Also topics on hormones that the doctor recommends, is there other things to take besides processed medicines? I have talked with several ladies, and what they really want is good up to date information, new ideas to deal with all the above, and maybe a place where they can all gather and chat and exchange their feelings.

I have not actually gone through a natual menopause, mine was surgically forced...I had a hysterectomy when I was 26. Maybe some good information for us who go through it all at once, instead of gradually like it supposed to be naturally.

Thank you for allowing me to express my input on menopause.I know you will be receiving a lot of email on this subject, so I will try to keep this as breif as possible. My basic approach is to just "go with the flow", and try to experience menopause in as positive a light as I can. I have used no herbs, but have relied on letting the experience happen, and trying to draw more into my reflective self, when I felt the need. The rages..mmmm..I've had my fair share (LOL) and again, felt they were something I as a woman should experience..I never directed the rage at anyone and my husband has learned to just let me ride them out...although I'm sure he wandered if I was losing my mind at times..

My biggest concern at this time is that I have no sexual drive along with vaginal dryness. I would be content to just ride this out, too, although my husband says he kind of understands, of coarse he does not. We have always had a very active sexual life, and he misses it. Somehow the cuddeling and caressing just doesn't cut it for him. So, I would like to see more information on reactivating ones sexual drive.

Most important menopausal focus should be alternatives to modern medicine, as always. Diet, food preparation, emotional issues. Website should be easy to understand not a lot of scientific talk unless it is explained. Information should be accurate and current.

Men seem to be a bit confused about what to do and what not to do. Some would like to help but feel that they always end up doing or saying the wrong thing.

One of my biggest gripes with other sites is that they tell you to take such and such herb or vitamin. In either case they usually do not tell you how much, how often or where to obtain the said herb. The complete info on where to find what a person needs or how to make it ourselves would be great.

I am interested in finding out more about perimenopause and the natural treatments for symptoms of night sweats, foggy brain, depression, incontinence, low sex drive, low energy, weight gain, and extreme moodiness.

IVillage is a good site with informative articles, but they lack the natural information that I need, and I have not seen anything about low sex drive on these sites. They tell what herbs and vitamins are good, but do not list detailed formulas or doses. I do not trust buying herbs at stores that are pre-capsuled. How do you know if you are getting the real herb and not just fillers. I prefer to grow my own and take them in the form of teas or tinctures, or to get them from someone reputable.

Focus should be on depression, anxiety, moodiness, weight gain, and low sex drive. For me its most important to find reputable information and not just something repeated from a medical book or physicial.

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